Tuesday, January 26, 2010

The Concept of Cheating.

The concept of cheating has always fascinated me and maybe that's why I have a very hard time trusting. When we're young, we tend to cheat at games. When we grow older, we cheat on our other halves. I'm not saying that there's a link but on the other hand, I'm not saying there isn't. My little cousin is 5 Y.O and he cheats at every game!!! Old Maid, Snap, even random games. He has to win.

I then realised that people cheat because it's either they want to:
1) "Win" - Their concept of winning is very twisted. You know the concept of taking a life? It's when you take a life, you own that life. So, when you break a heart, in a twisted manner, you own the heart.

2) Bored - Have you tried eating the same thing everyday? You'll get tired of it and you'll start thinking of alternatives and then you will start eating different things.. This happens when there's no room for the couple to breathe.

3) Accusation - This is associated with one of the partner's low self confidence and constantly accuse their other half of cheating. Just to prove the accusations are correct, they cheat. At the end of the day, you want to be right or you want your other half to cheat?

4) New Toy - Can you remember the time when you have a new top/dress/toy/watch? You're so fascinated with it and you love it so much. Until something new comes along. The same thing in a relationship. New doesn't mean better.

5) Seduction - MOST men are the weaker sex (Ah Beng agrees with this!) and they generally succumb to the seductions of other women. I have a 40Y.O friend married and the wife is 6 months pregnant. He moved to Malaysia for her and her friends are hitting on him. You DO NOT hit on your friend's husband when she's 6 months pregnant!! But you know, Malaysia Boleh!!!

6) Accidental - This is a poor reason for an excuse but it happens all the time! First, it's the seemingly harmless drinks with some friends, leading them to dancing and a seemingly harmless kiss and then straight to bed. It's like shit happens.

7) Pussy Whipped - Ah Beng loves this term. OK. Imagine a guy and his GF doesn't allow him to hang out with his guy friends (bad influence!), can't smoke (not healthy!), can't drink (might lead him to get with other girls) and can't watch porn (no sex and no porn) and maybe, JUST MAYBE can't masturbate. What's a guy gotta do? Or a girl? Cheat.

8) Whine and Complain - Even though a relationship means sharing all the tears and the pain, nobody wants to go through all the tears and the pain everyday!!! Can you imagine that the guy/girl keeps complaining EVERYDAY??? Compared to another person who makes you laugh and makes you happy? The Whiner is technically pushing their partner into another person's arms..

9) Falling out of love - It's opposite of falling in love. Though this area is still grey! Can someone just wake up one day and decide that they don't love their other half anymore?

10) For Fun - Living on the edge. Taking chances. Having Fun. Need I say more? "Fun" stuff are never good... etc: Alcohol, drugs, clubbing, cheating.

Growing up, I heard so many stories about people cheating. Family friends, and even family members. I was so disgusted and I saw the hurt cheating caused. I vowed to myself that I won't fall in love.

As I grew older, I became a whore (not literally! But a female version of a player) and I played around. It's always me breaking their hearts before they break mine and hurt them before they hurt me. The concept of cheating still never failed to fascinate me.

After talking to 50 people, most in a relationship and I found out that they have thought about other people besides their partners. Like what Ah Beng tells me; He can do it (cheat) but he choose not to. It's all about choices. It's simple really! You can either choose to cheat or be faithful.

Personally, guys who cheat are boys to me. Real men like my dad and your dad would never cheat because well, they're real men and real men don't cheat!

Disclaimer: Ah Beng here doesn't refer to a typical Chinese "lala" guy but rather it's my term of endearment for him. It is not in any way associated to the Malaysia definition of an Ah Beng.

~you know I'm fascinated~
Michelle May
xoox

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