As I'm writing this, I realized that as long as money exist, humanity is doomed. Humans, in their DNA is incapable of doing good and Kant said that, "From such crooked wood as that which man is made of, nothing straight can be fashioned."
In Nottingham alone, you can find lots of shitty people, from the lecturers to the students. I'm only grateful of the knowledge I will gain in this place and the 2-3 friends that I have. I used to be such an idealist that people are nice and etc but I guess I was wrong.
What I learnt in Political Economy is that, people will always maximize their gains and in other words, they're always gonna do things that will benefit them and they are selfish in nature. Whereas, what I learnt in Theories and concepts in IR is that, humans are evil in nature.
Why do I want to spend the rest of my life trying to change the world and trying to make this world a better place when the humans should be doomed? I don't feel sorry for the millions of people affected by nature in Japan or China. I think they deserved it because these people are the worst.
I FEEL KINDA LOST RIGHT NOW. I guess what Ntawi told me before was true. "Michelle, know your focus. You're not here to make friends or try to impress people, you're here to study, get your Masters and get out of this shit hole"
Everyone told me that "Machiavellian" was the way to go. Its better to be feared than to be loved. Though, I loved The Prince, I've never agreed on Niccolo's idea. I've always believed that being loved is better than being feared.
Anyways, I'm gonna leave this post with Kant's thoughts. "Two things awe me most, the starry sky above me and the moral law within me"
Maybe Kant has given up on humanity, maybe I should too....